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For a long time, I tried very hard to be a good mother — not just in my own eyes, but in everyone else's.
I worried about whether my child was eating enough, sleeping well, learning the right things, and reaching every developmental milestone on time. I read parenting books, followed advice from experts, and often compared myself with other mothers. Whenever I saw someone doing something better than me, I felt I should try harder. I wanted to be patient, creative, organized, and always emotionally available. In short, I wanted to be the kind of mother that everyone would admire.
But motherhood gradually taught me that this was an exhausting and sometimes impossible goal.
There were days when I was too tired to play, too busy to prepare a perfect meal, or simply too impatient to respond with a smile. I used to feel guilty about these moments, as if every small mistake would somehow affect my child's future. Eventually, I began to realize that I was spending so much energy trying to become a perfect mother that I was forgetting to enjoy being one.
So, I finally stopped trying to live up to other people's expectations of a good mother.
I still care deeply about my child's health, happiness, and future. I still want to provide her with love, security, and opportunities to explore the world. But I no longer believe that being a good mother means sacrificing every part of myself. I am also a person with my own interests, ambitions, emotions, and limitations.
Perhaps the most important thing I want my daughter to learn is not how to become a perfect person, but how to live freely and confidently as herself. And I believe I should set that example.
I am learning that a good mother does not have to be perfect. She just needs to be present, loving, and willing to grow alongside her child.
